Former Australian Prime Minister John Howard lambasted government schools for being too politically-correct and failing to teach children values.

He may have something there however I believe that he gives too much credit to schools for teaching children values. It is parents that have the greatest impact on children in this crucial area.

Admittedly, parents generally choose schools for their children that have a philosophy and a set of values that they feel comfortable. In many ways schools are a reflection of their parent community.

It is a truism that children learn what they live. Children, in their early years, pick up the essential values that govern their environment. For instance, if tolerance of differences is lived by those around them then children will more than likely learn to be tolerant themselves. The view of the world that parents present is usually mirrored by children.

Adolescents will generally question their parents' values and may even challenge them. One way of finding your own voice is by challenging and even rejecting the dominant voice you grew up with.

Children will also pick up the values of their peer group. That's why many parents become downright jumpy about the types of friends their children may choose. A mark of maturity is shown when children reject values that some of their peers project. Usually when this occurs they are falling back on the value system that they have learned at home.

This places some responsibility on to parents. So what values do you live by? What values do you portray? What values do you talk about and develop a vocabulary for at home.

Here are five basic values that I believe are important to develop in children if they are to achieve their best, fit in with others and learn to stand on their own two feet.

5 positive values to promote:

Respect: When children respect themselves, other people and the environment they have a basic value that will help them achieve and also get on with others

Independence: When independence of thought and spirit are valued children develop a set of problem-solving skills that help them be autonomous.

Perserverance: By linking success with effort children learn that hanging in there or working tough pays off.

Responsibility: Taking responsibility for behaviour rather than making excuses or shifting blame is the mark of personal leadership. (Lack of responsibility is national problem at present but that is another story!)

Self-discipline: Those children who practise impulse control and learn that they can't always do, say or get what they want generally achieve more in the long run. A number of studies indicate that internal locus of control is an essential element for success.

Parents need to provide two a map and a compass for their children to help them move into a healthy adulthood. The map refers to the stories of their life and their family history that gives children a reference point. The compass refers to a set of values that their parents lived and believed in that will give them a strong sense of direction.

More at www.parentingideas.com.au